Clinical Psychologist Dr David Coleman, an Irish parenting expert with three books under his belt, is setting out on a nationwide tour to help parents understand the role of anxiety in the lives of children and teenagers.

Giving parents a toolbox for the issue of anxiety in all areas - from social media to school - the talk aims to reframe anxiety as a normal part of life that can be regulated and accepted rather than eliminated.

"It's such a normal part of life," Dr Coleman tells me, speaking over the phone ahead of his October tour. "Actually, it's a very functional emotion to have because if we weren't able to be anxious, we would probably put ourselves in a lot more danger.

"We need to be able to feel anxious at times but, equally, we need to be able to regulate that anxiety so that it doesn't become overwhelming and prevent us from doing the things that we need to do. I think that's the difficulty for a lot of children and teenagers."

Dr Coleman believes that, although anxiety disorders* do exist, many young people are simply allowing their anxiety to build up to the point that they believe that they have a condition, rather that seeing it as an emotion that can be regulated.

"It's just much more helpful to think of anxiety as another feeling," he explains. "It's going to be temporary; it's going to come, but it's also going to go. Like every other feeling, there is a low level of intensity or you can feel it as a high level of intensity."

The psychologist says that, although symptoms of anxiety can be 'switched on' in some scenarios, there are plenty of tools that can be used to help regulate the strength of the emotion.

"They need to be able to bring it down enough so that they can feel the fear and do the thing anyway," he says, explaining that if kids start to steer clear of certain situations, it can form a habit of avoidance.

The tour, which runs across the country from October 2 - November 7, hopes to teach parents some of these self-regulating tools, so that they can encourage children to take on these situations in the right way.

"There is a tendency from parents to want to protect their kids," he acknowledges, "but the danger of over protecting kids from challenges is that they never find the confidence or inner-strength to be able to cope with challenges. They never have the chance to develop much resilience. "

Far from dismissing children's worries, though, Dr Coleman encourages parents to actively listen to their children's concerns and 'tune in' to their feelings.

"When parents can acknowledge the intensity of their child's anxiety, it's helpful," he says, noting that if you 'gloss over' a child's concerns, they likely won't believe that you understand the gravity of the situation and, therefore, won't listen to assurances.

"You need a strategy, whether it be a relaxation technique or a breathing technique, that works with your child to bring that adrenaline down. Then you're encouraging kids to use a bit of positive self-talk: 'You've done this before; yes, it's a challenge but not one you can't cope with, I have great faith in your abilities'."

Ultimately, Dr Coleman says parents should show children that things are worth trying and that there is a sense of achievement gained from challenging yourself - even if things don't go perfectly.

"Reduce the physicality of symptoms, create a positive mindset, attempt to do the thing that scares you, and then reflect on the experience afterwards and realise that you did okay."

As well as sharing helpful information, the psychologist hopes that the live events will become a safe space for parents to connect and ask questions.

"The presentation will be about anxiety and how to help kids cope with that, but then there will be an open forum Q&A at the end. It's about half an hour and parents can ask about any of the challenges of parenting in 2024, which is probably mostly going to be about coping with technology!"

For more information on the tour and to book tickets, visit davidcoleman.ie/tour/

*If you believe you are suffering from an anxiety disorder, be sure to speak with your GP. If you have been affected by issues raised in this story, please visit: www.rte.ie/helplines.